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"In this tempestuous, havoc-ridden world of ours, all real communication comes from the heart."

- Etty Hillesum

November 27, 2006

Various baby stuff.

Vin, thanks for the doggie advice.

She was in the bedroom with us � her own bed in the corner � but she was still peeing in the middle of the night even when she was in with us. We booted the dogs out of the bedroom about 2 months ago. The baby is going to be in the bedroom for the first few months (until we can get a 6-hour sleep out of her) and we wanted the dogs to be used to NOT being in the bedroom. And we didn�t want them to associate their getting booted with the baby�s arrival, which is why we did it so early.

I usually take away the water at night right after they�ve eaten dinner � so it�s not that, either. I really think she�s lazy. Because she can hold it (and does, when she�s boxed in) � she just chooses not to!

The doggy diaper idea isn�t a bad one � I wonder if she�d be able to get out of it, though. Hmm.

We got out her old crate and she�s done two nights in it � with no major whining. The second night she went in voluntarily (okay, she chased a treat in there, but still � I consider that �voluntarily!�). So I think I�ll stick with the crate until such time as it becomes a problem.

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I got the proofs for my second photo shoot � MUCH better! I look WAY more relaxed. I like some of them a LOT!

Blue liked them, too � which was the whole point of having them taken � so YAY!

And I don�t look nearly as huge in the pictures as I feel � which is an awesome little extra perk. I kept looking at a couple of them and thinking, �Hey! I don�t look like a whale in that shot!� (I do look whale-ish in a few of them, but � eeeh, what are you going to do �)

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The baby continues to be VERY active. I mean, way more active than she�s ever been. Once she�s awake, she just continues to kick and punch and wriggle for hours. It�s really kind of bizarre. The voice in the back of my head is thinking, �Dear GOD, what�s she going to be like once she�s OUT?� She doesn�t seem to sleep much in there.

It can�t be comfortable in there � she spends a ton of time moving her left foot and leg around. It feels like she�s searching for a more comfortable place to put it. Unfortunately for her, there�s nowhere to put it, really � so she moves it back and forth, back and forth. You can see it pushing across my abdomen and back, repeatedly. The right leg seems to be permanently back behind her tush. I wonder if it�s stuck!

Occasionally she�ll move in such a way that she punches my spinal cord. I know this because I�ll have a jolt of electricity shoot down one leg. We were in the car coming back from church yesterday and she kept bashing on a nerve � my OW!�s got progressively louder until she stopped. It was really uncomfortable, and no matter how I tried to shift, she just kept bashing me in the same place.

Glad she�s growing stronger � all signs point to a very, very healthy baby.

I know I�ll miss her once she�s out. That�s why I�m not really complaining � and why I keep saying, �I�m not ready!�

I really had no idea how wonderful it would feel to be pregnant and carry a baby around. I spent a big chunk of my life not even certain I ever wanted to have a child. Then, once we were trying (and failing), I was ready to move to adoption rather than pursue IVF. It was Blue that really nixed the adoption idea.

And now � well, I still think adoption is terrific. I would do it in a heartbeat, without any reservations. BUT! Now that I�m carrying around my child in my belly � now I am so glad, so grateful, and so happy that we were able to get pregnant. This feeling � of growing another human being inside me � of having this bond with this little person � of sustaining her and nurturing her and protecting her while she�s inside me � this is absolutely the best feeling, ever.

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My one-time housecleaners are coming today.

I am still trying my best not to clean before they get here this afternoon.

We�ll see!

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Oh, yeah, Vin, you asked about the contractions. It�s pretty normal to just have more and more of them throughout the last month � they�re not necessarily meaningful. It just means that my uterus, that big muscle that has been pretty relaxed and dormant for so many months, is �practicing.�

Even though I�m starting to dilate, she dropped, and I�m having contractions � I could still go to 42 weeks!

I�m guessing I�ll be somewhere close to my due date � I certainly don�t have a feeling I�m going to be late.

I will do my best to post a �this is it� entry if we head to the hospital. I don�t anticipate that for another week or two, though!

And somehow, I don�t think it�ll be Blue running around crazed when I go into labor. It�ll be me. I�ll be emptying the garbage cans, and running the vacuum, and doing silly stuff like that. I can almost guarantee it!

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Last Few Entries

Back? - November 10, 2007
Just a break. - June 19, 2007
Caddy day in the pool. - June 05, 2007
Sleep! And sleep, and sleep! - June 01, 2007
Happy days are here again ... - May 30, 2007

� More about Etty Hillesum, the woman in the photo.�