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"In this tempestuous, havoc-ridden world of ours, all real communication comes from the heart."

- Etty Hillesum

September 18, 2006

The miracle that is cake.

I�m exhausted.

Remember my lack of motivation from, oh, the past eleventy weeks?

I really think it�s been more lack of energy than lack of motivation.

And now I have proof!

I�m anemic. My body has lost a pretty decent amount of its oxygen-carrying capacity, which means that I am more tired, more quickly out of breath and more likely to want to do nothing more than nap nap nap the day away.

My hemoglobin levels are so low � (�how low are they?�) � they�re so low that if I were one of my oncology patients, I�d be giving myself hugely expensive shots of erythropoietin to try and stimulate the growth of new red blood cells.

But I�m not one of my oncology patients � I�m one of my OB�s pregnant patients. And that, my friend, means that I am officially taking iron pills the size of Easter eggs.

I took my first one yesterday. Blue kept asking how I felt. �It�s not like an amphetamine, Sweetie. It�s not going to be instant.�

�Oh,� he said, looking disappointed.

�God, I�d kill for some amphetamines,� I replied.

Heh.

It�s fine. I�m actually a little relieved that there�s a physiological reason for all of my heart-pounding, short-of-breath tiredness.

And the good news is that at the same time they tested for anemia, they tested for glucose tolerance. I passed that bad boy with flying colors � no gestational diabetes HERE, thank you very much.

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Blue and I took a quick trip at the end of last week. He had to go for business and my OB said I was healthy enough to go along, even though she didn�t really want me traveling after wee k 24. (We�re now well into week 27).

For one of the days we were there, I did a little Spa Day. The hotel where we were staying had a really nice spa � so I booked the works. Massage, facial, and pedicure.

Honestly � the massage was only so-so. There�s only so much they can do to get to sore muscles when you�ve got to be all propped sideways on pillows because of the big belly. She�d be relaxing one arm and the other would be twitching and falling asleep. It was disappointing, really.

The pedicure was great, because frankly, it�s becoming harder and harder to reach my toes comfortably. Oh sure, I can put shoes on � that�s quick. But to bend over and spend time down there � not so easy.

The surprise of the day came with the facial. I�ve never been a big facial girl � I mean, I�m just not into it. I wash my face twice a day with a nice cleanser and I moisturize religiously with something that has UV protection in it. That�s about it. I don�t wear much makeup at all (a little powder to control the shine, sometimes some eyeliner).

But the facial was FABULOUS.

Why?

Because she put me on this bed that sloped downwards towards the head. Which meant that my feet (achy, slightly swollen from the flight) were elevated. And that the baby, who has been pushing on my bladder for nearly seven months, was OFF of my bladder for the first time. I had no pelvic pressure whatsoever � which I have nearly constantly and I had no idea how annoying it was until I had complete and absolute pelvic relief. I fell ASLEEP, people. It was heavenly. (And quite frankly, the facial girl did a better job of massaging my head, neck, shoulders and arms than the massage girl did.)

Ooooh, I wish I could have one of those beds right here in my bedroom, right now.

Mmmmm.

Aaahhhh.

Then (and perhaps this is the best part) when I said something to the facial girl to the effect of, �Blah blah blah, and now that I�m turning 34 next week �� she replied, �Your birthday is next week and you�re turning 34? Hmm. I am usually spot-on in figuring out ages by looking at faces. That�s what I do � I can tell how old someone is by looking at their face, and wrinkles. But you � I would have thought YOU were around 24, not 34.�

I don�t care that she was probably lying. It was music to my ears. �Normally I�d recommend a daily collagen treatment for women your age,� the whippersnapper said. �But I think you can hold off for at least another five, if not ten years on something like that.�

HA!

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Okay. I need to get my butt in gear. I have to go to the clinic for a few hours and see some patients. Then I need to head to the maternity store and see if I can�t find a few shirts that make me feel better about myself. My ugly duckling crisis from last week is still partially in force; I feel pretty okay in my casual clothes. It�s the work clothes that just aren�t working. (And if work clothes don�t work, you�ve got problems!)

Just a couple of tops � maybe three. If I can find three tops, I�ll be a happy woman.

And then tonight �

� tonight, my friends, I get birthday cake. And Blue is on a diet, which means that I won�t have to worry about him snarfing down all of my leftover cake. IT�S ALL MINE! That may be the best birthday present ever.

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Last Few Entries

Back? - November 10, 2007
Just a break. - June 19, 2007
Caddy day in the pool. - June 05, 2007
Sleep! And sleep, and sleep! - June 01, 2007
Happy days are here again ... - May 30, 2007

� More about Etty Hillesum, the woman in the photo.�