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"In this tempestuous, havoc-ridden world of ours, all real communication comes from the heart."

- Etty Hillesum

April 20, 2006

Checking in.

I have been gone not because I'm smug about being pregnant ... I have been gone because we've been out of town.

Definitely not smug. In fact, I am highly nervous that something isn't right. My symptoms of queasiness and heartburn are waning ... and they're supposed to get worse, not better. ("Supposed to" according to the little voice in my head, not according to anything factual.)

'Nother blood test tomorrow to check hcg. I keep thinking, "I'll be fine after the next one ..." but the truth is, if this pregnancy continues, I'll spend at least 28 weeks of my life in a sort of suspended animation. (I pick 28 weeks because that's pretty much the smallest a baby can come popping out of there and be A-OK. Any younger than that and you're going to have issues.)

So I have to get used to feeling unsure about this whole thing.

It went too horribly wrong the last time for me to think that everything can possibly go right.

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Last Few Entries

Back? - November 10, 2007
Just a break. - June 19, 2007
Caddy day in the pool. - June 05, 2007
Sleep! And sleep, and sleep! - June 01, 2007
Happy days are here again ... - May 30, 2007

� More about Etty Hillesum, the woman in the photo.�